There's Always Vodka

Unless I drank it all. In that case, we'll need some more.

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There’s a new pope, and he speaks Spanish.

So…there’s a new pope. Living in Miami I’ve heard a lot from the Hispanic community about the first South American pope, and I’m wondering why. When I first heard there was a new pope, and that he was from South America, I called my mother to get her thoughts on the subject ( She’s Colombian – and very proud of that ). As soon as I said “Hi”, she screamed into the phone that we had a new pope, and that it was a great day for South Americans. Okay…sure. I can understand there being a feeling of national pride for Argentinians, but should there be? The papacy is not an international competition. The pope belongs to the entire Catholic community, and not just one nation.

I think it’s a shame that ignorance and bigotry is so prevalent in our society that we can get so excited about the new pope being “one of us”. It shouldn’t matter what race or nationality he is. The only concern should be, “Can he do the job?”. We are all equal, are we not? There should be no feelings of superiority because Pope Francis is “ours”. It should not even be an issue. Do Hispanics now have a direct line to God? Uhm…no. Are they now God’s chosen people? No, again. Aren’t we ALL His children? Or is it just nice to have a pope who can speak Spanish without the help of a translator? Maybe.

There should be a sense of community among the world’s Catholics, and there very well may be, I’m just not getting that feeling.  I’ve tried getting the answer from my mother on why it’s so exciting, but she doesn’t understand my question. I’m just too American to understand the Latin culture, she says.

I will continue to talk to people around town, and get different views. I’ll update this post if I ever get the answer, but somehow I don’t think I’ll get it. I’m just too American to understand.


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Flowers, please

I know it’s late to be writing about Valentine’s Day, but I’ve been catching up on my RSS feeds and coming across a lot of Valentine’s Day posts. I’ve realized that it really bothers me that my boyfriend and I don’t acknowledge it, let alone celebrate it.

We live in Miami, and Valentine’s Day can get a bit overdone here. Actually any holiday is overdone in Miami, but Valentine’s even more so. It is really annoying and commercial, but I’ve never been able to celebrate it. I’m the self-appointed queen of first dates, but I’ve never let any of my dates take me out on Valentine’s. That just seems weird to me. Now I’m in a relationship, and I still can’t celebrate it. Even if we hadn’t both been sick with the flu this year, we still wouldn’t have celebrated.

I might not be that upset about it if there were other romantic moments in my life, but there aren’t. I made a comment once to my boyfriend that he didn’t have a romantic bone in his body, and he said that wasn’t true, but I’ve never seen evidence to support that claim. His excuse is that romance takes money. I don’t believe that, but he won’t listen to any of my suggestions. It makes me wonder if romance is just dead. I hope not, but it’s hard to tell right now.

Our anniversary is next month. He can’t even remember the exact date, so I’m definitely not holding my breath for that one. I don’t need or expect a grand gesture, but I love flowers. It would be nice to get some roses , or a walk through the park. Even a home-made card to let me know he remembers would make me cry from joy. It’s just a little thing that I’ve realized I need right now. It’s been a tough seven months, and I need something to make me smile.

It seems nothing makes me smile these days. I started a self-portrait project last month, and decided to postpone it, because none of my smiles looked genuine. I was smiling, but my eyes weren’t and that wasn’t the look I wanted for my project. I suppose I could have continued with it to document the journey from  depression to joy, but I just don’t know how long that will take and I’m afraid that processing those photos will make it worse.

I’m trying to get back to normal, but it’s been a long time since I’ve felt normal. This might just be my new normal.




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Friends? Yeah…probably not.

I’ve been thinking about friendship lately. Specifically the types of people who make good friends, and those that don’t that we keep around anyway.

We all have that one friend. The one that we may not see for years at a time, but the bond is so great that we are able to pick up where we left off as if no time has passed. They are the people we can always call in the middle of the night during an emotional crisis to listen to us cry. They are our partners in crime (I’m not admitting anything, you have no proof), our best friends, our family. Without them, we wouldn’t even know what real friendship is.

Then there are the “others”. They are the toxic, selfish, self-absorbed people who throw around the word friendship only when it is convenient for them. They are the ones with the “out of sight, out of mind” mentality. They only call us when they need something, because we’re the only ones who haven’t given up on them yet.

Why haven’t we given up yet? It must be more than just the longevity of the relationship. Perhaps it’s loyalty for the one time out of a thousand that this person was there for you. Maybe we are hoping that this person will surprise us one day, and actually call just to say “Hi”. They probably won’t, because there is just no changing a person, nor should there be. Either we accept this person for who she is, flaws and all, or we should move on.

Is there any point in fighting for a friendship that doesn’t really exist? Can it even be called a friendship if it’s completely one-sided? I’m coming to the realization that it may not be worth my time anymore. There are only so many times I can try to explain this concept to someone before it becomes a repetitive exercise in futility. It might just be time to say goodbye.

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Sometimes I hate Facebook

I had to post this on Facebook today, because of the ignorance and intolerance my “friends” were displaying.

An open letter to my Facebook friends

Due to the amount of hate speeches I am seeing this morning on my news feed, I will be unfriending some people. This is not a reflection on how I feel about you. I am simply dissociating myself from negativity. Calm, wise debates can change people’s minds; hate speeches, name calling, and slander only succeed in further dividing us as a nation.

Anybody who knows me – in life, not online – knows that I value free speech and I welcome intelligent discussions on a number of issues. Sadly, this morning it has become clear that emotions and not logic are in control of these “discussions”.

If you are not happy with the results of this election, remember that we are not a two-party system, and you have more choices than you may be aware of. There were six candidates in this election. There were 13 in 2008. You had choices, and you will have choices in 2016.

My challenge to you for the next four years is to do your research. Educate yourselves on what this nation needs to do to recover, survive, and thrive. Align yourselves with the candidate that best reflects your beliefs, instead of who mainstream media will try to push at you. You have the power to make a change. Next time make your vote count.

Here’s some cute to cleanse your palates.